Everything you know is a lie

I'm left-handed, my feet are cold, I sympathize more with Joker than Batman (though with Jack Nicholson as Joker, that's not hard), I waxt to write but can't, I want to go shopping but can't, I despise that JC brat and would love to have a large Irishman named Roy go at him with a hammer...but can't...so I think I'll put on my Sartre costume and go scare some kids or kick a puppy or make a nun cry or something...

It's cloudy in New York, apparently...what I wouldn't give to be there instead of here...

Well, at least I can always count on the fact that people suck...

You know what, though? I need a lackey of some sort...an assistant, I guess.

And in the meantime...those kids won't traumatize themselves...